For my last paper we have to do a research assignment on the subtopics of forgiveness. I was browsing through academic articles when one caught my eye: Forgiving the September 11th Terrorists - Associations with coping, psychological distress, and religiosity. . I knew instantly I was intrigued and wanted to do this for my research PowerPoint project. Before I did anything, I thought about the title of this article... do I forgive the terrorists? It definitely took a little bit of time before I realized my answer, and truthfully my answer was; yes I do. I don't expect others to forgive because this wasn't something to take lightly, but after taking this class I see all the positive concepts that go along with forgiving. It soothes your soul and gives you the sense of peace. There are things we cannot change; the unenforceable rules as my teacher has taught us. That's demanding something that we have no power over. It's not so much that I'm saying "forgive and forget," because in the sense I think my type of forgiveness towards the terrorists is more of a pity gesture. I pity that they value life so little and they were brought up to believe that what is wrong... is right in their beliefs. At one time they were all children and because of the world's hatred, it poisoned their minds.
I ended up staying up till 4 am this morning doing research. I became hooked on it if you will; couldn't stop. Sadly, I actually watched a YouTube video that was a documentary of the phone calls the families received from the victims in the World Trade Centers. It was definitely a trip down memory lane and I cannot believe that September 11th happened so long ago; 2001 to be exact... I remember I was just a wee-small 9th grader. I remember getting ready for school watching the plane hit the tower. I thought it was a very sad tragedy and the pilot must have lost control - in never registered until later that day how horrifying the events really had become. After watching this documentary, I found myself getting quite bitter. How could anyone forgive such evil? Was I really willing to forgive that type of murder? Immediately I changed my answer and was furious. I didn't even know if I wanted to finish my paper at that point. And then a thought entered my head... it was actually something that one of the victim's mother had stated, "The world doesn't stop for every tragic loss of life, and you know, I kind of wish the world could." Of course that statement hit home for me and I instantly thought of my step-dad. Death is a part of life, and I think that's also something we cannot change. People come into our life to make a difference and make us better; that's a blessing in itself. I'm not sure the terrorists ever felt that sort of love about life and once again I'm back to pitying them. What's the point of living to only focus around death and suffering? It's such a waste. What do you all think about this? I hope I don't offend anyone by writing this... just really have been thinking about it while I do my paper. I just think by not forgiving is in a way letting them win; letting that hatred consume you. We need to respect the heroes that day and remember them; not remembering the fact that we couldn't change what was done those 9 years ago. Moving forward involves the process of letting go something that is very painful to us; so by forgiving these terrorists, I think it's a way of not allowing them to take one more second of our time. We will always remember; just not them.
I think a lot of people forget what Christmas truly is a lot of the time. It's not just about receiving gifts from others, it's about a feeling. This feeling to me is the sense of peace I get every time December returns. I stop what I'm doing to open my eyes and realize what a blessing it to be alive. We need to take advantage of that fact and live life to the fullest... because you don't know when it could all end.
A part of living is also loving. I believe families are there for a reason. I don't know what I would do without mine because they have been there for me so much over the last two years. This year is truly different for me because it's not about the normal way of spending the holidays. No, now it's appreciating one another to the max. I know this will be the last Christmas that my step-dad will be here and that means something to me. I want to be able to share these days with him and see the beauty that we are given every single day. Not anyone or anything can take that feeling away from me.
So here is to the blessings in our life, here is remembering those who have lost their lives too soon, here is to remember what this holiday season really is. Life really is a gift from God - I don't plan on wasting that.
PS: By the way... I think I have a little bit of A.D.D when it comes to my blog :) I am always changing it constantly. Kind of mad though, I spent so long last night trying to find out how to change the font to make it more custom for the titles. I read a really good blog that helped me step by step and believe me, there were a lot of steps. And after all that, it didn't work. I think it's my computer won't let this one thing work which is the main thing you have to do to change the font. Bahh-humm-bug. I just wish I could make my blog a little bit more personal but it's hard to figure out all those things. Least I have some great Christmas pictures up. Love Rudolph - used to watch that movie everyday in December. And then there is an awesome candy-cane picture & an old vintage picture that I think is amazing.
Anyways enjoy the weekend.