Saturday, July 30, 2011

You've Got to Be Kidding Me!

[Warning: Negative Blog Post Below]
Do you ever just feel frustrated with life? Because I sure do. I feel like sometimes no matter how hard you try, it just isn't good enough. I've been really optimistic for the past few months...especially considering how hard the last two years have been, and certain days it's as if God is sending me a break, but the majority of the days in my life...just seem to be killing me ever so slowly.

I did "walk" in the Spring and graduated, but I am officially done in a week..a WEEK (Summer graduate - they only do two ceremonies). Once again I'm taking Math 4020 (yes had to retake it). If anyone has been reading my blog for some time now, they'll know how much I despise math. It's honest to God been my nemesis since I was little. I have the creative mind...not the logic mind. The math that I'm required to take is absolutely absurd too. It's high upper division when all I want to do is teach kindergartners and write novels. I just don't get it. The beginning of retaking this class, I felt positive and happy that I knew what was going on; thought it was going to be breeze. Boy was I wrong. It quickly escalated once again and this just might be the math that I might never be able to pass. I have tutors, made study groups, checked about 4 books from the library...nothing helps. A big problem is that I have anxiety when taking tests. This summer class is consisted of quizzes that count for a lot of points. I just took one yesterday and really thought I did good...nope, did the worst yet! I need all the points I can get and my grades are declining. I am OVER COLLEGE. I'm not retaking it once again. I absolutely refuse.

I'm seriously just at a loss. I even emailed the professor, but they never really help that much...especially the math teachers. They never do extra credit and just say "Keep studying! Need to get blah blah blah to pass." I have to get a straight C in the class in order to be done; it's not looking good.

So after crying, throwing my phone...I'm sitting here ranting and raving, wishing sometimes I had a different brain. Well there goes my happy-go-lucky-weekend.

Hope everyone else is having a better day than me.

xo.

5 comments:

  1. You can do it!!!! Just think once you get through this then you won't have to look back and worry about the hard math stuff again!!!!

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  2. I was the same way! I use to have nightmares about math classes! You can do it, you're almost there :)

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  3. Ah no fun at all! My roommate was having the same sort of problem-- walked in May and just had to finish one last class over the summer but it ended up being super difficult! I'm sure if your professor knows the situation he/she will end up helping you in the end, but I know it's frustrating trying to deal with them as well :( Good luck with it all, you can do it!!

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  4. I feel ya with the frustrated with life thing. I feel like a lot of people are going through a funk right now...so we're all in this together :)

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  5. You are almost done! You can do it girl!!!! I'm hate math too so I can totally relate. Ironically, it's now something that I'm forced to use almost everyday in my job. Grrrr

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