Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Feelings

Ah! I haven't written in a while: YIKES.

How was everyone's Christmas celebration? Mine was absolutely wonderful. But that being said, it was a little strange as well. Christmas Eve was fun going to the Nutcracker (which was breathtaking as usual), and then the family came over for a dinner celebration. When everyone left however, I got that sad feeling that Greg wasn't with us. It really hurt my heart. My mom gave me PJ's as she has every Christmas Eve, and we read a book together. It was nice. The next morning, Christmas morning to be exact, it still was weird. I probably didn't act as excited with my gifts as I should've been. But sitting there, without Greg, I'm sorry...but I didn't like it. My older brother even called from Idaho crying, saying he missed "Dad" so much, and the day didn't feel right. I suppose I wasn't the only one right.

Last week was also hard for other reasons...health reasons. There was a scare, and I'm not going to go into great detail, but I'm still waiting for some results. I'm scared and almost lost my faith last week - but if Christmas showed me anything, it's to never lose that faith. God is always with us, guiding us, standing by our side. I felt though, that every time I seem to be really happy, something horribly goes wrong. I need to have hope that it's just life, and that's not whats truly happening in the scheme of things.

But with the weird and the bad, came good (as life usually does), I officially got in a relationship with...Will. Ha, I felt weird talking about him on my blog, but now, I don't care. It might've been a little sudden, but it didn't feel that way to us. I've known him for five years, and he's the greatest guy I've ever known. He treats me completely different than guys have in the past...and that means something to me. All my family and closest friends can see a change in me, in this guy, and that also confirmed it for me. The feelings I get with him are just so different, and yes, a little scary. I'm falling for him fast because it feels so effortlessly, but with that, you have your guard up. My step-mother Kim, told me it's okay to let yourself be vulnerable, and just feel what you are feeling. She's right. I say it every time, but everyone deserves a cleans slate, even if you have been hurt every single time. I'm scared, but I want to take this chance on something great. I teased Will the other day; in five years, we don't have one good picture with each other. Guess we'll just have to fix that won't we?! Just so thrilled with this. He gets me better than a lot of people do, and every day I find something else we have in common with one another. I love it, I truly do.

Anyways, this post isn't going to be full of pictures like my other ones...sometimes you just need to express yourself through words. That's why I started this blog in the first place.

Please let me know everyone how your Christmas was, and what are your plans for New Years? I'm going to this huge Greek party thrown by the Greek Knights! I'm so excited :) And I am excited to finally have a great New Years kiss!!

Here's hoping for a wonderful 2012!!! Time to make some resolutions. xo.

4 comments:

  1. first of all love
    CONGRATS!! i am so happy for you
    i wish you&him the best .. ♥♥

    now ... i hope everything is ok
    i got scared for a little bit..
    let me know if i can do anything
    for ya! i am here :)


    i had a great xmas!
    i hope you did too ..

    hugs love!



    xoxo
    Melina

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  2. Keep being strong girlie :) We need to learn to be happy in the good times and the bad...for God is with us through them all! :) Congrats on the boy!

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  3. I'm sure I've said this before, but I am so so sorry for your loss. I hope everything with your health turns out alright. And I'm happy for you that you have found such a great guy.

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  4. So happy for you girly!! Have a happy New Year & all the best in 2012 :))

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